Pretty young Penelope and her husband have everything they could ever want and more, courtesy of his shrewd business sense that offers them a life of luxury. Unfortunately, he desires a simpler lifestyle, one free of all excess material trappings. But, she’s got a trick up her sleeve to keep things just the way they are, even if it means having to sacrifice their marriage…
Penelope grew up poor, pitifully poor. Pretty, playful, yet quite polite and presentable, she was also very impractical, particularly when it came to popularly-accepted social positions. That’s where her pragmatism underperformed profoundly, practically every time. She found the disparity of classes perturbing and problematic. Above all, Penelope wanted a prosperous and plentiful life – not a paltry and disappointing existence.
Although she managed to escape the latter predicament years ago, it was now apparent her current situation was a precarious place, thanks to her husband’s parlous, preposterous idea. If he had his way, all her proud, priceless possessions would predictably disappear. No longer would they live in a posh property, but in a plain, unpleasing abode. It pained her greatly to even ponder the prospect of giving everything up.
Thankfully, Penelope had ample panache and pluck. A duplicitous plan to escape this awful, implausible pickle. She would not succumb to plight or asperity. Even though it involved proverbial peril, she was willing to persist in pursuit of preserving her privileged position. And, when the pettiest of petulance accidentally escaped through her poignant proclamation of non-compliance, her resolve to resist grew so powerful nothing could put her off of it, no matter how ponderous, painstaking, or protracted.
Penelope grabbed the nearest fountain pen and a blank sheet of correspondence paper to compose a contemplative, compelling letter to her previous impassioned lover. Perhaps, with the right persuasion, she could convince him to participate in her imperious plan. If she used the right phrasing and expressed her predicament, he would surely help.
“Pretty, pretty Penny! Never thought I’d get a post from you!”
“Humphrey, please call me by my given name; I prefer Penelope.”
“Do ya’ now?”
“Yes, I do. If you extend me that courtesy, I’ll refrain from referring to you by your nickname…Gasser.”
“Got to say I don’t much mind that name – Gasser that is. Truthfully, never been too fond of Humphrey.”
“Well, for our purposes, Humphrey will fit rather nicely.”
It had been years since the two were even in the same room together. The last time Penelope and Humphrey saw one another she walked casually away, leaving him for another man – her current and only husband – Winslow. What Gasser lacked Winslow had plenty – manners, character, education, and most importantly, money. She never regretted her decision because it was best for everyone involved. In many ways, that was the correct attitude. But, it did leave Humphrey brokenhearted and Winslow with a lot to deal with.
Penelope was a complex personality but one thing about her that always remained simple and constant – social status. In her eyes, wealth provided everything she needed in life. Things like romance, love, and children weren’t a priority. In fact, none of the three was necessary for her. Although, she regularly leveraged her husband’s love to get her way. And, it was the same emotion she’d use to manipulate Humphrey for her own gain.
“Tell me, Humphrey, why did you respond to my post with a personal call?”
“The wording, I suppose.”
“I see.”
“And, you know me, I’m always willing to help those I’m most fond of when they’re in need – even if it means meeting in an alleyway.”
“Dear Humphrey, it’s one of your biggest and best qualities. I’m in a bit of a predicament here. Fortunately, I have a solution…one that will benefit not only me but you as well.”
“Penny, I…”
“Penelope, please.”
“All right. Penelope. I sense this is a dire situation – you wouldn’t resort to posting me if it weren’t.”
“That’s true. I don’t have many people I can turn to.”
“Seems odd to me, Penelope. Your home is quite lavish and I am well aware of your station.”
“That’s precisely what’s at stake. You see, my husband has this preposterous idea to give all this up – to live, as he says, ‘The simple life.’ It would mean the end of my current lifestyle.”
“You mean, you don’t want to go back to being poor.”
“I am fully prepared to make this worth your while.”
“And what would that be, Penelope?”
“Two-hundred and fifty thousand.”
“Hmmm…two-hundred and fifty thousand quid?”
“Yes, two-hundred and fifty thousand pounds, Humphrey.”
It was a lot of money. Too much to turn down without serious consideration. Gasser knew he was being used but didn’t care, given the incredibly large payoff. It was far bigger than any score he could ever pull off.
“So, what’s the gig, Miss Penelope?”
“You’re going to love this – kidnapping me!”
“If you’re giving me two-hundred and fifty thousand quid, I take it you’ll get a much larger sum?”
“Of course. But, let’s face it, Humphrey – you’ll never see that much money in your entire life. Better to cash in now, while the opportunity is available. If you’re not interested because you’re envious, well then, I’ll just get someone else.”
“Okay, I’ll do it.”
Humphrey understood her sentiment. After all, he knew Penny intimately. They once were lovers, a couple who scraped by as petty criminals. He got his nickname, Gasser, from “gassing” his robbery victims. Born to working-class parents in Birmingham, Humphrey barely finished primary school before joining a low-level street gang. His parents split up when he dropped out of secondary school and his dad died months later from a massive heart attack. His mother passed shortly after in a rundown council flat – the cause of her death was never determined. That left an angry, unloved young man to turn to a life of crime.
His illicit career began with picking pockets and later, breaking into houses. Humphrey was caught on one particular occasion, resulting in some serious jail time. That stint didn’t cause him to reform but to reinvent his procedures. He discovered – almost by accident – that rendering his victims unconscious was the best way to maximize his loot and avoid getting caught.
But, like most common criminals, Gasser never stole enough to make himself financially secure. And, just like many of his felonious peers, he was always looking for the big score. Now, here was his former lover, offering just that and it was too big to turn down.
“Very good, Humphrey, very good. Now that we have a deal, let’s go over the plan. Don’t worry, it’s not complicated and it doesn’t involve much work at all. In fact, it’s practically like getting something for nothing. Trust me, you’ll never come across another way to make this much money for so little effort!”
Although Humphrey believed Penelope was serious about her desire to remain rich, he didn’t think for a moment she had any loyalty to him or anyone else. This was the same woman who pledged to be his partner until death – though they were never married – and left him the moment she had the opportunity.
That opportunity came in a very peculiar way. She was busy scoping out targets in the local street market Gasser could pickpocket when a handsome young man accidentally bumped into her. He apologized profusely and offered to buy her fish and chips. She readily accepted. In less than three months, she completely overhauled her image, turning into a proper lady.
Penelope married Winslow when he was still an apprentice in an established trading house, sensing her husband would enjoy a meteoric rise in the financial industry. Within just a few years, he became one of the most influential men in the markets and that notoriety carried him even further. Now, he was worth well over $9 million but wanted to give up their lavish lifestyle.
To Humphrey, it was a sort of poetic justice – a rich guy who had his turn at living a life of fortune, ultimately being used by a woman who probably never loved him – just the money and the luxury. She was so selfish and superficial, those qualities dictated everything about her behavior.
Such a dubious partnership with her also meant having to stay on guard and alert – anything was fair game to Penny when it came to her own self-interest. And that cold hard reality almost made Humphrey feel sorry for Winslow. Still, even if Penelope’s plan robbed her wealthy husband of a few million dollars, he could definitely afford it, with such a big bank account, a thriving business, and a huge, fancy house right in the middle of the swankiest part of the city. A home that would soon become a potential crime scene. If only Gasser could see the look on Winslow’s face when the ransom demand arrived.
“Mr. Winslow, I’m afraid I have some terrible news, Sir.”
“What is it, Theodore?”
“Well, it’s a…it’s a…it’s about your wife, Penelope.”
“My wife!?”
Winslow couldn’t believe what he read. Some lunatic had abducted his beautiful wife and demanded a whopping $5 million ransom – about half of his entire net worth. But, even if he had to pay it, it would be worth the sacrifice to get his wife back safe and sound.
“Theodore, alert the authorities straight away. We have an emergency situation here – life and death.”
“Yes, Sir! Right away, Sir!”
Winslow sunk into the nearest chair, reading the ransom note over and over again. The language was crude, stern, and foreboding – leaving very little to the imagination if he didn’t comply.
“Mr. Chapman? Mr. Winslow Chapman?”
“Yes, I’m Mr. Winslow Chapman.”
“I’m Officer Julian Wells. I’m sorry we couldn’t meet under different circumstances.”
“Indeed, Officer Wells.”
“Now, I’m afraid I must be curt, please forgive me in advance. You received a ransom demand, I understand.”
“Yes, here it is.”
“Hmmm. Right to the point but…”
“But, what?”
“Well, give me a few moments. But first, allow me to ask a few questions.”
“Sure, go ahead.”
Officer Julian Wells’ gut instinct told him something was seriously awry. Armed with years of experience and very honest answers from the victim, he understood that this wasn’t a legitimate abduction. Too many missing pieces pointed to another set of circumstances.
“Mr. Chapman…how do I put this? Mr. Chapman, I highly recommend you get in touch with an expert in these matters. I suggest Mr. RL Dayton.”
“In what matters, Officer Wells?”
“I’m afraid I can’t speculate, I don’t want to give you the wrong impression. Although, I can tell you there’s just something that’s not right with this whole abduction scenario. But, as long as I’m involved, I have to go by the book. So, I’d advise you to speak with RL Dayton – an expert in handling these types of matters.”
“What is it that’s triggering such misgivings?”
“I can’t go into all that’s not adding up here. If you knew those details and accidentally telegraphed them to the wrong people, things could very well get a whole lot worse. You need Dayton to look into this right away.”
Officer Julian Wells knew to trust his intuition. Having over two decades in law enforcement, he fully understood hunches often turn out to have merit. Everything about this particular situation told him the true victim wasn’t the ostensible abductee – it was Mr. Winslow Chapman. As a duly sworn member of law enforcement, he couldn’t do what was necessary. But, someone like RL Dayton didn’t have such constraints.
“There’s a Mr. RL Dayton is here to see you, Sir.”
“Yes, yes, please show him in straight away, Theodore.”
“Mr. Winslow Chapman, I’m RL Dayton.”
“You came highly recommended by Officer Julian Wells. Thank you, thank you for coming so quickly! I greatly appreciate it!”
“No problem. I understand you have a bit of a situation on your hands.”
“Apparently. Officer Wells believes you would be of service with my predicament.”
“Perhaps – I need to know more. I need to understand what we’re dealing with here. I don’t mean to be insensitive but, I’ll need some information, some of which might be a bit personal – I apologize for any offense.”
“Not at all. I just want my wife back safe and sound.”
“According to Officer Wells, this is probably not a kidnapping, it’s likely something else altogether. Tell me, Mr. Chapman, how is your relationship with your wife…”
“Penelope.”
“Yes, Penelope. I’m terribly sorry to make such a mistake.”
“It’s perfectly all right. Well, we have our differences. But, we are happy.”
“Would you say that she is truly happy?”
“I don’t understand. Yes, she’s content – I provide very well for Penelope.”
“So I see – you’ve done quite well for yourself, Mr. Chapman.”
“Thank you, Mr. Dayton.”
“And, did you inherit all of this or is it a product of your business ventures?”
“That latter. I came from very humble beginnings, Mr. Dayton.”
“Good for you, Mr. Chapman, good for you.”
“How about your wife, Penelope? Did she come from a wealthy family?”
“No, she came from a poor family. Where are you going with this, Mr. Dayton.”
“Let me be perfectly blunt, Mr. Chapman. None of this adds up. I have considerable experience in many criminal matters and this isn’t what it first appears.”
“How? What do you mean?”
“Your wife just disappeared and this ransom demand promptly follows? Most abductors wait – they allow a day, two, three – to pass…that is, if they haven’t taken their victim right in front of the family. It builds up the family’s concern, anxiety, and urgency. In this case, the ransom demand arrived expeditiously, as if it were sent in a hurry.”
“And, what do you take from that?”
“Well, it’s very odd. Most kidnappers are patient, not impulsive.”
“Then, there’s the matter of the abduction itself. No one saw or heard anything – not a single witness. That’s just as curious, given Mr. Chapman is almost always surrounded by people – servants, friends, and service providers.”
“I see.”
“Plus, there’s no crime scene. Surely, someone as independent as Penelope would put up a fight, a noisy fight. That would leave a trace – and clues – as to where she was supposedly taken. But, that doesn’t exist, either.”
“Interesting.”
“Furthermore, in this ransom demand, the penmanship is elegant, as is the language itself. The grammar and word usage strongly indicate it was written by someone sophisticated – not a common criminal.”
“Yes, I understand criminals have their very own, unique vernacular.”
“Lastly, the ransom drop-off location and time. It’s well…it’s also a poor – if you will – an unprofessional choice. All of this points to either a complete amateur or perhaps, something a bit more disturbing.”
“The way you just made that comparison, it struck me as you having a preference.”
“Yes, I do have a preference. Amateurs are overly-nervous, quite anxious, typically impulsive, and have little to no patience. That’s a combustible combination, a very dangerous set of traits. On the other hand, if this is something other than a jackleg, we may have an opportunity.”
“So, what does all of this tell you, Mr. Dayton?”
“It tells me this isn’t an authentic abduction.”
RL Dayton made a name for himself as one of the first detectives. He took the practices of predecessors who established keeping basic identification of known criminals, their peers and accessories, and more to investigate crimes. Dayton solved some of the biggest cases of his day. But, he discovered that his skills were worth far more than the local government paid for such dangerous work. Private, wealthy people rewarded him handsomely for his services. And, he didn’t have to worry about policy and procedure, nor the bureaucracy or corruption. He could put his training, experience, and passion to good, fulfilling use.
“Tell me, Mr. Chapman, did your wife have any plans to travel?”
“No, not that I’m aware.”
“How about friends? Did she have any family or friends you’ve never met?”
“I don’t think so.”
“Anyone with an unusual fixation?”
“No, no one.”
“Mr. Chapman, now I have to ask you this, but please don’t take it as an insult. How about infidelity?”
“Certainly not. My wife and I have been faithful to one another since the day we took our vows.”
“So, you were her first suitor?”
“No. As I said, she came from poverty. I believe she had a brief relationship with a young man – before we met. But, she hasn’t seen or heard from him for many, many years. I’m not even sure he’s alive.”
“Do you know his name?”
“I think Humphrey, but I can’t say with certainty.”
“What about threats – have you received any? Being a successful businessman, it wouldn’t surprise me, Mr. Chapman.”
“I’ve definitely had my share of competition. But, I treat my people well, very well. I believe my employees are a fantastic asset, far too valuable to take for granted, Mr. Dayton.”
“I’m afraid that’s yet another anomaly. It’s quite common for an abduction to come after threats. Or, at least after mistreatment – usually a real series of insults or even perceived slights. It’s a way to get back at the perpetrator, you see. Particularly when it’s the spouse of a wealthy household.”
“Well, that makes sense to me.”
“Had she been corresponding with someone you didn’t know or weren’t comfortable with?”
“No, not that I’m aware, Mr. Dayton. Why?”
“I’m not quite sure what’s going on. But, it doesn’t have the makings of a kidnapping. In fact, everything points to something entirely different. Having said that, it’s in your and your wife’s best interests, to treat it as a genuine abduction until we have absolute proof. Therefore, I suggest you’re fully prepared to pay this ransom – just in case I’m wrong. I don’t want to give you false hope or have any part in turning this into an unnecessary tragedy. Still, we ought to have a contingency plan ready to go.”
“What kind of plan?”
“One that puts you at the advantage – that ensures your wife’s safety but also allows you to act according to changing circumstances. Give me twenty-four hours and I’ll have a better idea of what we are actually dealing with.”
“Okay, but please, work quickly!”
RL Dayton went over every available detail and carefully examined the entire house, but came up with very few clues. While Penelope was undoubtedly missing and there was a ransom demand, it still seemed unlikely she fell victim to kidnapping. He had very little to go on but he had to do his very best. And that meant retracing her steps was paramount to his investigation. If he followed her last known movements, perhaps that would provide the lead he needed.
“May I speak with Theodore in private for a moment, Mr. Chapman?”
“Sure, Mr. Dayton, sure.”
“Did Mrs. Chapman have any visitors in the last week, month, or any time you can remember you didn’t know?”
“No sir. She did not have any callers I didn’t know.”
“Look, I understand you’re loyal to the Chapmans, I would be too if I were in your position. But, this is very important.”
“I appreciate your concern. But, Mrs. Chapman didn’t have any strange visitors.”
“What about in the city? Do you escort her everywhere?”
“Yes, I do. Although, she often goes off on her own. I keep my distance to give her privacy when she requests it.”
“And, when did that happen last?”
Theodore’s answer gave Dayton his first real hope of catching a break. She had taken some personal, private time while shopping in the city.
“Hello and good day to you.”
“Good afternoon, Sir! May I help you?”
“Yes, I’m a friend of Penelope Chapman. Theodore and I are looking for something – a personal effect.”
“Oh, well, we haven’t found anything in the store.”
“So, she does shop here?”
“Yes, on occasion.”
“She might have accidentally left it with an old friend, a man other than her husband.”
“I can’t think of anyone. I rarely see Mr. Chapman and Theodore isn’t much of a conversationalist.”
“Perhaps she dropped it during one of her shopping days elsewhere?”
“Well, she did take a walk in the park while I made some alterations.”
“A walk through the park?”
“Yes.”
“Thank you, thank you so much, you’ve been a great help! Mrs. Chapman will certainly be thankful!”
Dayton scribbled down some notes along his way. With a few more inquiries, he finally had a solid lead. But, he didn’t like how this was playing out. Julian Wells was right – this wasn’t a job for law enforcement – it was a job for a private detective who could operate with a lot more latitude. And, someone who could devote the time and attention this case needed. That amount of commitment often did far more to solve a crime than anything else.
“Humphrey?”
“What? Do I know you, Governor?”
“No, I don’t believe so. But, you are Humphrey, aren’t you? Or, perhaps I should call you Gasser?”
“Well now, you obviously know who I am. But, I don’t know who you are, Governor.”
“RL Dayton.”
“All right, Mr. Dayton, what brings you to me?”
“Money.”
“Yes, the same thing that brought you to Mrs. Penelope Chapman.”
“What?”
“It took me some time, but I finally put the pieces of the puzzle together. Local law enforcement tells me you’re a pretty good thief, a petty one, but a good one, nonetheless. When I read the ransom demand, it was clear whoever wrote it spoke proper English and probably came from a position of means. No signs of a struggle, no witnesses, and no clear motive.”
“Mr. Dayton, I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Sure you do, Humphrey. How much is she paying you?”
“Who?”
“Penelope. How much is Penelope paying you for your participation? Me, I wouldn’t settle for less than a half-million quid. If it were me, my price wouldn’t be a farthing less than half a million pounds. You know, she’s demanding $5 million, right? Seems to me your cooperation is definitely worth ten percent – if not more.”
“Five hundred thousand quid, Governor?”
“Yes indeed.”
“Two-hundred fifty thousand.”
“Impressive. That’s enough to live the rest of your life comfortably – if you’re wise with it, that is Gasser.”
“My thoughts exactly, Mr. Dayton.”
“Well then, how about you and I make a deal? You get your money and Penelope finally gets what she’s always deserved.”
“Sounds good to me, Governor. But how?”
“Just be at the ransom drop-off and I’ll explain everything then.”
Dayton now understood precisely what he was dealing with. People like Gasser don’t make the unbelievable leap from breaking and entering and robbing to kidnapping a high-profile socialite. Those types of low-level criminals just don’t have the skillset or the experience to pull off such a big caper.
“Humphrey, who was that at the door?”
“Oh, no one really, Penny, just a chimneysweep looking for work.”
“Penelope.”
“Right, Penelope…sorry about that love.”
“Now, you’re ready to pick up the ransom money?”
“Yeah, yeah.”
“Humphrey, this is very, very important. We’ll go over the plan once more. Besides, anything that keeps me out of hiding in that dreadful cellar is perfectly fine by me.”
Penelope painstakingly prepared the perfect plan. It required precision and patience. Though she wasn’t particularly pleased with relying on Humphrey, she had little choice to procure her big beautiful payoff.
Dayton had everything perfectly arranged for the ransom drop-off – the money carefully packed in duffle bags and ready to pick up when Gasser arrived.
“Is it all there, Governor?”
“Yes, all five million. Plus, something a little extra for you.”
Humphrey hurried back to their hideout where Penelope impatiently waited for his return. She quickly opened the bags and hastily counted out Gasser’s share.
“There now, just like I promised, two-hundred, fifty thousand!”
“You’re right, I’d never see this much money in my life!”
“All right, now, don’t forget the escape plan. You can’t stay in this city any longer. So, tonight, you’ll make your way out of town. I suggest settling somewhere low-key, a place where you blend in.”
“And, what about you?”
“Oh, I’m off to another city. I’ve already made the arrangements – I’ll be leaving tonight, as well. So, why don’t we have a drink and a toast to celebrate our good fortune?”
“Delightful idea, Penny.”
“Penelope.”
“Sorry love…Penelope.”
“To a long, healthy, and rich life!”
“Yes indeed, love.”
“Now, Humphrey, if you’ll excuse me, I’ll pack my things.”
“Oh, yes, go right ahead. I think I’ll sit down, I’m feeling a bit queasy.”
“Are you now?”
Penelope casually walked out of the room and returned shortly, nonchalantly placing her things near the door, only to be startled by a sudden, loud knock.
“Yes, who is it?”
“Constables, Ma’am. We’re going door to door. May we speak with you for just a moment, please?”
“Certainly.”
Penelope opened the door, greeted the visitors, and showed them inside.
“I’m Constable Lewis, this is Constable Fry, and this is Mr. RL Dayton.”
“Hello, Gentlemen. Tell me, what can I do for you?”
“Unfortunately, we’re here on official court business. These documents are for you, Mrs. Chapman.”
“How did you know my name?”
“We know everything, Penelope, and so does your husband, Winslow. In fact, those papers you’re holding, they’ll explain everything.”
“Petition of Dissolution of Marriage! This is outrageous! Is this some type of sick prank?!”
“No. I’m afraid it’s not. Now, if you’ll step out of the way, the constables will take those bags.”
“But, those are my bags!”
“Actually, they’re the rightful property of Mr. Winslow Chapman. Humphrey, how are you feeling?”
“Just fine, Governor. I drank that stuff like you told me.”
“Wait, what stuff? What are you talking about, Mr. Dayton – Humphrey?”
“You’re partner here, I gave him a bottle of antidote when he picked up the ransom money earlier.”
“Antidote?”
“Yes, for the poison you slipped into his drink. Wasn’t that the plan, Penelope? Put this poor fellow up to a nefarious plan then put him into an early grave? Constables Lewis and Fry are here to escort you – the magistrate will see you first thing in the morning.”
“See me for what? This is preposterous!”
“No, this is justice, Penelope, this is justice.”
