Fumbledierk. That’s what all his teammates called him. Even the coaches (who previously discouraged and disciplined all the name-calling offenders), called him now, especially after costing the team a much-needed win late in the fourth quarter, nearly knocking the bunch out of the championship game contention.
Dierk was big for his age. He was also taller than most of his peers. But, very fast for his size and more surprisingly, agile. He could easily take on any cornerback with a signature juke and eye-popping evasive moves. Strong, tall, fast, and quite athletic, he posed a very real threat to any opponent on the field.
Unfortunately, he just couldn’t hold on to the ball, which is why his teammates modified his first name, referring to him only as “Fumbledierk.” In fact, he wasn’t merely prone to dropping catchable throws, he had a lot of trouble holding onto hand-offs, even short shovel passes. Despite his size, speed, and prowess, he lacked the one key skill he most needed to possess and use.
Dierk tried everything he could – no matter how ridiculous or preposterous it appeared or made him look. The young athlete stopped at nothing. Anything that could help him to hold onto the ball was worth a shot. After all, he wasn’t necessarily the smartest kid in his school. But, if he could demonstrate his natural talents and showcase his strengths, that meant a full ride. An athletic scholarship to a reputable college and from there, onto the pros. Unfortunately, he was quickly running out of time to prove himself to the scouts.
Thanks to his teammates, Dierk’s club made it to the championship game. He wasn’t even supposed to dress out for the matchup, but a few unfortunate injuries made it an unavoidable necessity for the coach to begrudgingly tell him to suit up. Now, he sat on the sideline bench – riding the pine – but, still ready to go into the game at a moment’s notice.
The crowd was richly rewarded for their attendance. The excitement began with the kickoff, an incredible series of events, put into motion by a duffed kick, ultimately resulting in an unbelievably awkward return for a touchdown. By the end of the first quarter, the score was tied at two touchdowns apiece. The second quarter saw a real show of defensive mastery, limiting each team to just one field goal, running the score up to 17 – 17 before the half.
During the third quarter, the offenses picked up their pace and broke through the defenses early on, only to have the defenses respond with tough shutdown tactics, resulting in a touchdown and another field goal. Now, 24 to 20, Dierk’s team led by four points going into the fourth quarter. By no means a huge lead, but enough to capitalize on and stretch out by three or seven points. Then, the unthinkable happened. After a successful field goal that put his team up seven points, the opponent’s offense drove hard down the field, eating up precious minutes, taking the clock down to only six minutes, and coming away with a touchdown, setting the score 27 to 26.
Next, a bit of risky but successful trickery raised the stakes even higher. A clever sleight of hand gives the offense a 27 to 28 lead with a sophisticated and brilliant two-point conversion play. The ensuing kick did little to improve Dierk’s team’s position – forcing them to start on their own 3rd-yard line.
A reinvigorated defensive squad now took the field and didn’t give up an inch. On the first down, Dierk’s team only managed to gain a foot past the line of scrimmage. Second down didn’t fare much better, a couple of yards at best and that was with a favorable placement by the referee. Now, on third and long, they needed a breakaway play to put them into field goal distance.
Incredibly, they managed to convert but still remained a long, long way from field goal range, with the line of scrimmage at their own 15-yard line. The defense was beginning to tire but definitely wasn’t about to give up the game. On the offense’s second first down attempt, a six-yard run – not bad. The subsequent second down, another play that kept the ball on the ground, yielded two more yards.
At third and short, Dierk’s team had captured enough momentum to convert again and came away with a huge run – placing the ball on their own 30-yard line. Just a couple of more plays could put his team closer to mid-field, giving them the opportunity for another field goal and a win. On first down, a short, quick pass out to the sideline moved the ball seven solid yards. Then, a second down run added two more yards. But a third-down pass failed to convert for another set, leaving them stranded near the 40-yard line with injuries on the field.
Time out.
Now, with no other choice left, the coach reluctantly called for special teams to punt. But, the kick didn’t put nearly enough comfortable distance between the offense and the end zone. All hopes of coming back began to rapidly vanish as the offense lined up for their first down.
At nearly the end of the fourth quarter, the offense confidently moved the ball more than half the distance to the goal, deep into the red zone. Second down decidedly inflicted even more damage on the defense, who was already beaten up and quickly running out of steam. Dierk’s team was teetering on disaster with a humiliating loss looming large.
Third down and goal.
Dierk’s coach used the team’s final time out with only over a minute left to play. Any score now equaled a gigantic loss, essentially snatching defeat out of the jaws of victory, as the old cliché goes. The turn of events was almost too much for the coach to make sense of and he struggled to maintain what little composure he had left. It was now or never. Nothing could be held back – nothing could be left in his impressive bag of tricks.
Out of options and desperate to stop the offense at any cost, the coach yelled, “Fumbledierk! Fumbledierk!” He came up with an ingenious, unorthodox idea to get the ball back – put Dierk in as an “offensive interrupter.” His one job was to crouch down and roll right into the offensive lineman. Once the o-lineman tripped, the quarterback would be exposed.
Under a minute left in the game.
The quarterback handed off the ball to the halfback, who got caught up in the faltering line and scrambled trying to break free. The defense knocked the ball loose from the running back – a fumble! Another offensive lineman unsuccessfully tried to jump on the ball to secure it, but it kept popping out from under him, as the defensive players desperately tried to grab it.
The center managed to get a hold of the ball and flipped it behind him, intending for the quarterback to catch it and scramble to the sideline, but the QB got trapped and Dierk intercepted it.
With all the speed he could muster, Dierk ran furiously to the twenty, down to the thirty, across the forty, over the fifty, past midfield to the forty, right through the thirty, into the red zone. He leaped across the fifteen, the offense hastily pursuing, grabbing frantically, trying to stop him as he crossed the ten, the five, and into the end zone…touchdown!
